Other people’s kids
Last night, I took the boys to the monthly Cub Scout meeting because EJ was busy with work. This was a busy meeting, what with turning over the toys they collected at school to two U.S. Marines for the Toys for Tots program, getting their chunk of wood to change into a Pinewood Derby car, listening to a “sales pitch” from a local Boy Scout troop trying to attract the older guys who will be moving on in the Spring, and concluding with a gift exchange between the boys. The rule was to bring a wrapped toy, around 5 dollars in value. Sitting in a circle and listening to a story, the boys were to pass the gifts around. Luck would dictate what gift they took home. At soon as the dust settled, kids were wheeling and dealing, working on getting other toys they wanted more.
Frankly, I was chatting with other parents and not paying attention to the gift exchange that much. But once we got in the car, the complaining started. Apparently, one kid had been a jerk about the whole thing. He had proposed an exchange to Gabriel, only to renege on it a couple minutes later. Moreover, he had grabbed Emmanuel’s toy and yanked so hard on the cord which was supposed to make the toy run that the toy seemed to be broken. Or so the boys said.
Emmanuel observed that in a dispute most parents, including me, tend to side with the other kid, not with their own flesh and blood. But to make matters worse, the boy’s mother had come over and apparently supported her son’s change of mind about the exchange. I had been nowhere around. This morning, they were still talking about the unfairness of it all and how that boy was going to grow up to be very selfish if nobody ever taught him otherwise.
While perusing the parenting site Babble for a work assignment, I happened across this piece about disciplining another child. The writer writes about the changes in expectations over the last 40 years. Whereas parents used to be expected to keep other children in line if their parents were not around, today’s parents can apparently get very upset if somebody dares reprimand their kid. At least, the mom in this writer’s story did.
I was cowardly relieved that I did not witness the whole episode last night and did not have to choose a position. But since it is the third episode I hear about or witness with that particular child in a couple months, I feel it won’t be possible to ignore him forever. So what is a mother to do? Talk to the mom, talk to the child, talk to both? To say what? “Your child is acting like a loud, spoiled brat. Are you planning to do something about it?” Argh!
One thing is for sure. We met the boy in town recently with his dad and he impulsively said he wanted to have a play date with Gabriel. When hell freezes over, buddy!
kelloucq
le 15.12.09 à 19:20
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